WAITING

He said he will be preparing a very special "x'mas+new year+valentine" gift for me...
I wonder what will it be? Really can't wait to see how special the present is!!!
No matter what is he going to give me...I'm sure that I'll like it very much~! ^^

* he = L

UNFORGETTABLE X'MAS

Christmas had just passed; I’m still up to update my blog. Nothing was so special for this Christmas. I had no received any present from him, other than just a greeting message. What an “unforgettable” Christmas without Christmas dinner with him, without Christmas present from him, not even a single Christmas celebration night with him.

To be honest, I’m not happy. Really unhappy! I don’t really care whether he gives me any presents for Christmas or not. However, I do care that he doesn’t really spend much time with me during Christmas, especially a Christmas dinner with me which I’m looking forward for so long. I spent all my time to prepare a present which I feel that it is so meaningful for him, but he doesn’t seem to like it at all. I should have known it, but the present really meant a lot to me, so I decided to give him no matter he likes it or not.

(part of the preparation of HIS Christmas present)

PS: the outcome is not really a good one, so i refuse to post the picture up, LOL!

He might be busy spending time with his family and friends. I can understand that he doesn’t really have much time for me. Suddenly I feel that I am so stupid, too stupid to accompany him in Brisbane until Christmas Eve, too obsessively thought that he is going to plan a Christmas dinner with me, too curious to find out what will he give me for Christmas present. Everything is just delusion. Feeling so disappointed when the clock reached 12am just now and I get nothing from him but just a call telling me that he was going out with his friends for a drink. Try to comfort myself a little bit with a lie – maybe he is just too excited to return home and busy planning for his gathering with friends until he neglects a little ME? Yes, this might be the only excuse that I can think of, just to console myself for being not too upset.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME, A LONELY CHRISTMAS TO ME~!!! AND I WISH FOR A HAPPY NEW YEAR~!!!

* he = L

TODAY IS SPECIAL

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.

Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

LOVE YOU

We argue again and this time, we both stay silent. Just acting like strangers, talking to each other softly, at least I try not to put too many emotions again on my face, try to calm myself down. I really want to know, are you happy to be with me? Or you are just enduring? I am happy, undeniably happy to be with you, although not all the time, but most of the time, I am. How about you? You seem to be so stress, stressing out by work, and still stressing out by me, by our relationship. I try hard to keep myself as tolerance as possible as everyone knows, I'm capricious. Not to fuss about everything, although I am always looking for fairness in relationship, but there will never be one. Sometimes my misgiving might lead to more and more misunderstanding. Arguments start to burst out in no time, uncontrollable. I hardly raise my voice in arguments, just to hope that you don’t, too. However, you can hardly control your anger and unsatisfactory, I can understand. Every night I make a vow, not knowing who I’m making to, the same wish I make, is to be together happily and not having unnecessary arguments with you anymore. 2009 will be the 1st year for us celebrating Christmas and New Year and I hope this will not be the last. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you~! Love you~!

GOING BACK SOON

Woohoo~! Going back soon...
Really can't wait to go back to my hometown, get some nice food that I can't get at Australia, hang out with all my friends and buddies, spend some time with my family~!
Woohoo~! Wait ya guys~! Jeanette is coming back~!!!

DREAM

I dreamt of you, dreamt of you sliding a ring into my forefinger...
It was so sweet, it felt so blessed, I wish I would never awake...
At that moment, the world was filled with joy & happiness...
I wish I would never awake, never awake from that sweet dream...