FAITH IN LOVE?

Have been thinking a lot lately, maybe it’s because I’m not that busy this semester, ends up I’ve got a lot of leisure time.

Read a blog titled “Relationship and Flings”. It was really an interesting post. As this reminds me about whether or not I was clear enough on all my pre-relationships… I’d been into so many relationships before, and I found out that not every single one can be said as “being in a relationship”. Those were to be ‘qualified’ as a relationship, should at least be more than half a year, I guess. So, seriously, I was not into so many relationships but flings instead.

What’s fling? Through Wikipedia, you’ll know that fling is a brief of casual relationship. And what’s a casual relationship? It is defined as a physical and emotional relationship between two people who may have a sexual relationship or a near-sexual relationship without necessarily demanding or expecting the extra commitments of a more formal romantic relationship. Yes! That’s what I’d gone through so many times, lasted for few months and ended without any commitments! No pain, no awkward feelings, and definitely continues on with friendship.

I don’t know why I failed in all the past relationships. However, I do believe that relationship is based on both parties but not one! Sometimes, I’m so envy of friends with long term relationship. Why can’t I be like them? I always ask myself the question that I can never get the answer!

When time goes by as my experience gained from pain and memories, I don’t trust promises and commitments! They are not meant to be kept but to break… So, I don’t give any promises as well because I don’t have the full confident on achieving one!

Few days ago, I chatted with a guy which he seemed to face a lot of problems in his previous relationships. And definitely, he felt very upset! As being a stranger for him, he shared so much of his inner voice and I was being a good audience, tried to listen and to comfort him. He asked me about mine, too. And the only thing I told him was “when you no longer have the faith in love, then you’ll no longer feel the pain in love…” He was shocked on what I typed and so did I. Is it true that I no longer have faith? Or it is just an excuse for me to run away from something/someone? I don’t know. I guess I’m just too tired of being in the world of “romantic relationship”!